(Sometimes I feel a bit sarcastic, and it rages just a little)
That crazy Mormon Church I belong to teaches me that when our children are born, they come strait from the presence of God, as former angels. It teaches us, our children are innocent with happy expectations of learning and growing through the challenges of life experiences.
Mormons don't believe in original sin. Mormons believe children are not born wicked, but born innocent, pure and full of love.
So, if you want to raise a Liar and truly corrupt the child, it takes a bit of effort on the Parent's part. So here are a few hints and tips to accomplish the task.
Remember the child came from an environment of pure unconditional love, so you have to teach them "Conditional Love", so you are going to have to harden that heart of yours. Knock out any feeling of empathy you may have for the child. Let them know with out any doubt that your affections are completely dependent upon pleasing your every whim and expectation.
Anytime you think your child may dissapoint you, let them know a head of time of your expections, and the consequences of your dissapointment.
Jesus Christ taught us to Turn the Other Cheek when offended. The Old Testament was less pathetic, it teaches us to limit punishments to an "eye for an eye". Apparently we are not supposed to make the punishments more than the crime. Ignore this advice at all costs! The last thing your child can believe is that you are fair and balanced in your punishements. Always make sure the punishment will far exceed the crime!
The child has a conscience to be silenced, if you control yourself in punish more severely than necessary and prevent the child from defending themselves verbally and physically, you can prevent them from feeling those old feelings and nature of justice instilled in every child's heart as an infant from the "Light of Christ." The child needs to see you as unjust. The child needs to know you are not going to hear them out. The child needs to have confidence in the fact you can't handle hearing anything that displeases you.
By instituting unbalanced punishments you can silence any feeling of loyalty they have. Remember if you are kind and understanding, and nurture with love and respect, (damn that respect) the child will act on their own conscience and feel guilt at any offense they give you. You don't want the child to feel guilt for lying.
Make sure to instill as much emotional abuse as possible when displeased. Let them know how disgusting they are, how physically unattractive they are. No matter how skinny your daughter is, let her know she is fat. Belittle every attempt the child makes in pleasing you.
Read the book, "The verbally abusive relationship" Yes the book is intended to stop verbal abuse, but you know, it's got some very clear examples of how you can truly verbally and emotionally abuse your children when the need arises.
Make sure the child feels trapped without hope.
Yell as much as possible. But just yelling isn't enough, you really have to sound like a good super villain. The movie Matilda, Eggar from Men in Black, Lex Luthor, the evil Guy in Gladiator are some of the greatest examples. I really loved Juaquin Phoenix's amazing job portraying a realistic villain. Much of what he says, I've heard before in person.
The child may have talents, and beauty that others appreciate, just ignore all of that. Focus entirely on every disappointment. Take no notice of anything they do right. Study the child's heart and mind, know their insecurities, and prey on them as much as possible.
Make sure to destroy any sense of peace and security the child feels around you. Walking on eggshells isn't enough. They need to feel like they are "Walking on broken Glass." The child needs to know they are going to get cut, and bleed if they make a false step.
And don't forget, never admit to a mistake. Don't let them think for a second you are honest with yourself.
Follow these amazing steps and you are sure to destroy the innate sense of justice, love, affection, trust, and empowerment the child came to you with. By making lies the only way to survive a relationship with you, you too can raise a Liar.
Children are not born Liars, they are made into Liars by parenting. That is unless they suffer serious head injuries as a child and have their frontal lobes damaged, then they will have none of the moral obstacles most children have.
How to raise an Honest Child
The truth is even if you are a good parent, all children will experiment with lying. How you handle those situations determine how the child will or will not make lying a part of their life. The best bet is openness and honesty. Just make sure the child knows you love them, you have faith in them. Make sure the child knows you can handle mistakes calmly. Let them know you are their to help them and you are on their side. Love is never more potent in the life of another than when they think they disappointed you, and you show love and understanding and help them through it. Let them know they hurt you in a calm voice, but that you still believe in you. Give them hope.
You can let a child know you are unhappy with their choices without degrading behavior. You don't have to belittle them to "discipline". Let the child know you're not going to "freak out" at every mistake.
Make sure the child knows you believe in them. Pray for an understanding of your child's amazing potential. Ask God what you can do as a parent to help the child realize that potential and strive for it. Show patience in getting there. Then pray and ask God to help your child see that same potential and seek after it. When disappointment comes, AND IT WILL, help the child to see past it, and chalk it up as a learning experience.
Don't punish the child for every mistake YOU made at their age.
I'm not the best parent in the world. I make lots of mistakes every day. But I do want my kids to know I love them. I want my kids to feel like they can talk to me when something goes wrong. I want them to feel emotionally safe in our home. Honestly I don't have the emotional energy to have many freak-outs.
Yes I do get frustrated, I get PMS, I do let them know when I feel frustrate in their actions. I do try to do it in a way they understand, I try to state the problem, explain the impact of the problem on others, ask them to improve, and ask what I can do to help them improve, and try to show them ways to fix it. I try to do it without excessive drama. I know my children love me and despite how it sometimes seems, they do want to please me. They do want to achieve. They do want to take pride in themselves. They all want to do great things. I know they want to do good in the lives of others. They do care. They want to live healthy, happy lives.
Sometimes I just look at my children and marvel at their beauty and talents. I marvel at all they have endured. I marvel at the greatness in each of them. I see them pursue talents I so badly wished I had achieved. I rejoice in their accomplishments. I bite my tongue at my maternal paranoias.
I take pleasure when they show they care for others. Raising kids can be so stressfull, their are so many challenges.
I want my kids to know I love them unconditionally. I want them to know I am willing to be there for them in their darkest hours. I want them to see the hope and light in the darkest days. But I know I may not always be able to be with them in those hours. I know I have weaknesses and faults. I may fail them. So I want them to know that no matter what, even if I and those they trust fail them, that there is a God far greater that loves them, and seeks after their good welfare no matter what. I want them to have their own relationship with God to get them through the times I cannot be there for them.
I fail in so many ways, but I believe in them. I know that despite how things seem at times, they will all do great things. I am and always will feel pride in saying, "These are my children".
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