Misunderstandings

An abuser will always make you feel like you're misunderstood.
They do not allow you to finish your sentences.
They jump on any half-truths ensuring you cannot communicate effectively. They dominate the conversation and interrupt as they don't want you to be able to explain and express yourself. They mock and ridicule your attempts to be understood.
The abuser will attempt to isolate you from loved ones so that you don't have a chance to defend yourself. Your very desire to defend yourself is mocked.
This kind of behavior always gives away the "bad guy". While the innocent plead for understanding, believing if they were just understood, everything would be okay.  But what the innocent don't realize is that the abuser doesn't want to understand them. The abuser just wants to justify themselves.  The abuser will dismiss with ridicule anything that eliminates their justification for the abuse.
My faith teaches of the Holy Spirit of Truth.  The Holy Spirit of Truth testifies the truth of all things. Thus someone living righteously will be in tune with the truth no matter what church they attend or don't attend. The earnest "right"eous always seek for the complete truth, especially in serious matters such as family.  A good person in careful and sincerely seeks thoughtful understanding.
You are not being abused because you are misunderstood.  You are being abused because you are submitting to an abuser.